Recently, while speaking at a conference in South Africa, I went down to the local strip-mall. (Think twenty picnic-tables filled with trinkets and clothes manned by a host of Africans screaming to get your attention.) Seeing a really cool carving, I walked over, picked it up and was immediately told how many SA Rand this work of art would cost.

“What is the significance of the three women?”
“What do you mean?”
“Who are they?”
“Three African women.”
(Hesitating)“Let me ask you a question: do you get a lot of tourists here? Many American tourists?”
“Yes!”
“If you want to sell more, then you need to wrap these women in African lore. Americans don’t buy trinkets … they buy experiences … memories. (Why else do your parents still have that cheap pink Flamingo they purchased while on their honeymoon in Miami?) Do you understand what I am saying?
“Yes.” (Spoken as he was shaking his head “No.”)

Years and years ago, Toyota realized that it had to build a reputation for offering reliable, quality built cars. So the carmaker spent millions on advertising “quality.”

Then, in a stroke of genius, it began running the now famous ad, “Toyota, O what Feeling!” the ad culminating with a satisfied customer jumping into the air—in s-l-o-w m-o-t-i-o-n. Slam Dunk. All competitors, both foreign and domestic, were left standing there with their shorts around their ankles.

Buying a Toyota was an experience—an intense feeling of joy and satisfaction. In the minds of millions of viewers, their product was, from then on, anchored into positive feelings. Of course, had the cars been nothing more than beer cans, the ad would have failed. However, it was the promised “feeling” that turned the corner and made Toyota the worldwide giant that we know today.

Seducing Your Audience
In his book, Selling Dreams: How to Make Any Product Irresistible, author Gian Luigi Longinotti-Buitoni (President and CEO of Ferrari North America) likens marketers to dream weavers or, in his words, “dreamketer.”

The role of the dreamketer is to seduce, to entice the customer into intense desire for the company’s creation. Seduction is much more than simply convincing: It is not about helping formulate a rational decision, but rather about provoking emotional locomotion. The craft of selling dreams, much like the seducers, requires continual surprise through a poetical transformation of reality into a romance that takes people into a dream state.”

“To succeed, dreamketers have to touch the customer’s dreams. They must ensure that the product or service is emotionally charged, by creating a design worthy of the company’s original taste.

They must construct a theatrical setting around the product or service, a home, an ambiance where objects of excellence are transformed into unforgettable experiences. They must assign a name to that setting: a credible and exciting brand that pulls the customers in and builds their expectations. They must relay a seductive message that confuses poetry with reality, truth with romance. Finally, they must find the customers worth seducing.”

Every person reading this is in sales. Whether seeking to convince someone to buy your idea or product, influence your employer, win over the love of your life, or persuade your children that you do know where their present behavior is going to lead them, you are selling something. And those individuals that most effectively provoke “emotional locomotion” are going to close the sale.

Most people think that selling their product (idea, knowledge, service) is accomplished solely through recitation of facts. (Teachers and religious leaders are often the worst offenders, here.) However, the individual that constructs a theatrical setting, creates an unforgettable ambiance, and converts facts into poetry, will be far and away the more effective and successful communicator.

I realize that some of my readers will be uncomfortable with Longinotti-Buitoni’s use of the word “seduce.” This is because the word is usually used pejoratively. However, think of a time in your past when you wanted to attract the attention of a potential Significant Other.

You dressed in a certain fashion, you carefully chose words that would help win the individual’s attention and affection, you spoke these words with an intentional tonality and timbre, and you took great pains to see to it that the ambiance was exactly what you needed to accomplish your intention. Now – subtract all sexual connotations from these specific acts and you will have some understanding as to what it means to “seduce” your audience.

Think of a communication context where you wish to be far more effective. Rather than solely considering how to change people’s thinking, if you will expand your focus to include the whole person — captivating as many of your audience’s five senses as possible (Visual-Auditory-Kinesthetic-Olfactory-Gustatory) — your effectiveness will increase exponentially.

Are you “eating” your money when you dine out to entertain a client, or, is your money well spent giving your company a great return on their investment?

With today’s tight budgets, dining or entertaining clients while staying within your budget is more critical than ever.   I have 3 simple rules to help ensure that you can justify the expense to your company.

Rule 1

Have a purpose and a strategy.
Know why you are having the meeting, and yes, whether you are eating out or entertaining, remember  it is a meeting.  Having a purpose and a strategy will ensure that your goals and objectives are met.  Ignoring these two elements is sure to eat your money up fast without achieving the desired result.

Have a briefing with your team to establish the technique of your approach.  But more importantly, have    a debriefing following the event.  This ensures that   you stay on target and help others understand their responsibility in the process.

Rule 2

It is not social.
The second reason why people do not get a great return on their investment is that they end up socializing instead of doing business.  The next time you are spending your company’s money ask yourself if you actually do more socializing than business.  A way to ensure that this does not happen to your meeting is    to repeat Rule 1.

Rule 3

Create your own menu.
To make the most out of your money, put your menu  on a budget.  In other words, scale down the menu     at a restaurant.  Design your own menu from the establishment’s offerings and this goes for wines as well.  Select low to medium range cost items.

Here are some tips to help you keep in alignment with your purpose and objectives of the meal (meeting).

1.  Prepare.  Ensure you take care of all the details as they are what define distinction.  For example, give your business card to the maitre d’ to ensure you get the check.  When the server presents you with the check, you will come off as being in control.  Remember, if you invite,    you pay!

2.  Control the meal without being aggressive.  If your client gets off track, get them back on.  Take responses to the questions back to help you resolve what you came to accomplish.

3.  Know the etiquettes and protocols of dining.  If you do     not know who orders the wine, who tastes it, when to begin eating or drinking, or how to place your utensils when resting during the meal, then I suggest brushing up on these skills.  This is particularly true for the X, Y, and    Z generations, where most do not know the importance   of these skills.

Whether you are trying to create new relationships, maintain existing ones or close a deal, off-site events are an excellent way to get the job done.  And implementing these suggestions will give you confidence that you are doing the best you can do.  And that confidence trans-  lates into success.

At meetings, are you treated with the same regard as your colleagues? Or are you treated like the stepchild of the organization. If so, it may not be entirely the fault of others or the reputation of the HR industry. It could, in fact, be your own actions that are keeping you out-of-the-loop.

The HR community has gone to great lengths building a reputation and changing perceptions. It has been a long and comprehensive process, yet an extremely effective one. However, HR professionals still strive to raise-the-bar on how their HR department is looked upon, or even closer to home, how they as an HR professional are perceived.

To help HR professionals accomplish this, HR professionals need to ensure their Professional Presence matches their title and profession. You have the knowledge and expertise of being an HR professional, but do you know how to communicate who you are and what you know to others?

Throughout my 22 years of working in the arena of professional development I have seen people not promoted simply because they did not dress, act or communicate appropriately. An organization is not going to take the risk.

I am not suggesting that your appearance and personality need to be a certain way to be successful. I am saying that if you follow a few professional guidelines, it can help close the gap between where you are and where you want to be in your career in a more timely fashion.

A great starting point in developing a Professional Presence is understanding first how others perceive you at first impact so that you know how to position yourself in any business situation. It’s called Perception IDentity™.

This program identifies how others see you at first sight; either authoritative or approachable. This perception is formed without knowledge or experience and is based soley on your physical characteristics and the overall tone of your body language. We call this identity your Perception ID™.

Once you identify your Perception ID™ the key is to learn how to strategically position that perception in important business situations. To help you position your Perception ID™ you need to incorporate the 4 Principles from “The Parker Factor”.

THE PARKER FACTOR

Principle 1:  Desired Perception
To determine a “desired perception”, consider the following elements from Image Positioning™ to create a scenario that will help in your particular situation.

Consider the dynamics of the situation. What do you want the outcome to be?  What is the relationship between you and the other participants? A situation may require an initial impact of an authoritative presence. We call this your “desired perception”. The next step of “The Parker Factor” is to determine how much of an authoritative presence you need to project in order to obtain your outcome.

Principle 2:  Percentage Impact
How much of an impact of your “desired perception” do you need to project? This is called “percentage impact”.

To position yourself as more authoritative, the question is, how authoritative do you need to be? This is based on a percentage scale.

The CPR of Image Positioning™ should always be considered when determining “percentage impact”. This percentage should range between 50-100%.

Principle 3:  Modification Quota
The next step is to determine how much to modify your Perception ID™ in order to reach the “desired perception” of an authoritative presence at 90%.

Assume that your Perception ID™ is 30% authoritative. To determine your “modification quota,” subtract your authoritative traits (30%) from your “percentage impact” (90%), giving you a “modification quota” of 60%. (90-30=60).

The key is to determine which impression-management-tactics™ to draw from in order to project an initial impact of authority.

Principle 4:  Impression-Management-Tactics™
To reach your “modification quota” of 60%, you must know which Channels of Communication are available to make your initial impact more authoritative. Options include Appearance and Body Language.

These Communication Channels are made up of many elements. When incorporating one of these elements to communicate a “desired perception” we refer to it as an im-tactic™.

It is not what you say, but how you say it that matters. Use a positive tone. You can “say” that you really like the idea of a new initiative, but using a sarcastic tone tells others how you “really” feel. People do not like being around “negative” people. You can disagree without being condescending. Instead, mention that while you are not sure if the initiative is effective for your group, you feel that other items might need to be resolved first, such as XYZ. Do this with a positive tone, reducing the risk of offending others.

Other than face-to-face communication the telephone has become the most popular vehicle for communication, with texting running a close second.

The telephone used to be a simple piece of equipment with which to talk with neighbors or to stay in touch with long distance relatives. Not any more! Today, the phone is used to stay in touch with coworkers across the hall as well as with clients around the world.

With this massive growth in phone use, etiquette and protocol standards are required if professionals are to maximize communication with others, while simultaneously reinforcing their established brand.

The e-generation, (those who grew up in the technology age) may find it a bit surprising that there are actual rules of etiquette and protocol to follow when using a phone. Because they grew up with a phone attached to their ear, they may not be aware that how the manner in which they interact on the phone can impact how both internal and external customers perceive them professionally.

I have listed 5 Key Points to help you create a standardized way of using the phone and its system capabilities to help maintain your established image (your company’s image too) in the marketplace.

Point 1: Answer the Phone With A Sense Of Caring
When answering the phone it should be done with enthusiasm and a sense of helpfulness. In face-to-face communication, 55% of how you communicate your attitude is with your body, 38% is with your voice tone, and 7% is with the words you actually speak; however, what about when you are using the telephone and there is no body language to “read”? Your tone says it all!

When answering the phone it is best to use a greeting using a pleasant response to allow the caller a comfortable way for continuing the conversation. For example:

1. “Good Morning, this is Tom Smith, how may I help you?”
2. “Hello, this is Tom, how may I help you?”

If you can, avoid an answering of just “Tom Smith”. It sounds too abrupt. Your greeting should be adjusted to the time of day. Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening are more formal than just a simple hello.

Point 2: Listen, Listen, Listen, And Listen!
When answering a call for others or yourself, listen. Give the other person time to state the purpose of his or her call. Do not rush them or cut them off. It would be rude and inconsiderate. I do not care if you are a Sr. VP, being rude is unacceptable in business. Now if your business is to be rude, then by all means, be rude.

We are all busy these days, and it seems there is never a good time to talk. If it is not a good time to talk, then do not answer your phone! If you are expecting a call from someone, and you cannot talk at that time, simply let the caller know. You might say, “I am sorry, Jane, I am waiting for a conference call, may I call you back at 2 o’clock? (Be sure to use the word “may” NOT “can”.) We know you can, but asking the other person what time is good for them shows respect.”

Point 3: Tag, You’re It! Maximize Voicemail And Time!
Voicemail is part of doing business.  When leaving a voicemail, consider the following:

1. Get to the point.
2. Always leave your name and a phone number.
3. When making calls in the car, turn off your radio!!
4. When canceling appointments on the same day, be sure to call and let the person know.

Point 4: Outgoing Message: too abrupt, too long, or just right?
The biggest mistake upper management makes when creating an outgoing message on their voicemail is to have their assistant leave it for them. Doing this does not make one very accessible wither to internal or to external customers.

It can sound arrogant, especially if the tone is of the same nature.  I recommend making your own message. If you have someone else leave an outgoing message, remember to have him or her  use a tone friendly and inviting. Have you listened to your out- going message lately? How does it make you sound?

Point 5: Respect Culture Differences
If you receive a call from someone who speaks a different language, be patient. Often when a caller falters or speaks slowly, it is not because they do not know what they want. Perhaps they are having trouble with the translation into English. Be patient. Be aware of diversity and show respect for others. Let’s give them an “A” for trying. After all, how many languages do you speak?

We all use the telephone more than ever. For most of us, your first time “meeting” someone is on the phone. This first encounter is just as important as if you were face-to-face. Meeting a client for the first time, you put your best face forward. You should do the same when meeting them on the phone for the first time. Happy dialing!